One day I realized that it wasn’t enough just to survive. As a survivor, I took what was given to me and was thankful for it. It could be a gift from my family, friends, or even the government; it didn’t matter. I learned how to get by with what I received. Settling for whatever came along was a way to keep the struggle going. Surviving feels like a resignation to the way things are right now. And there always is a reason for the way things are right now – today it might be the economy, tomorrow I might be unemployed, or maybe a relationship has ended or a loved one has made their transition. These are all different forms created by the same content that says I don’t deserve to be happy and filled with joy.
A Course in Miracles says in Lesson 100, “God’s Will for you is perfect happiness.” My function is to be happy in order for the world to see that God or Spirit loves me. I am then a messenger of Spirit by shining my light as an example to other people who might believe that we are asked to suffer or to live in fear.
Survival feels more like an existence than playing a victim role. I understand the difference all too well. As a victim, I hosted the pity party and did it with grace. It was my identity for a period of time, but I felt like I had let that go. Now I began to wonder what it would be like to live at the next level or to consciously create my life and be filled with joy. How could I transition to this way of living?
I knew that I had let go of my old life. I cleaned out the closets and gave away the things that reminded me of another time and place. I grieved and processed and accepted that things would never be the same. There was no more resistance, wishing, or bargaining. I discovered a sense of center again and my life was relatively calm. But, is this enough for me to be happy; or should I accept and be satisfied that this is my life? If living within my comfort zone was where I needed to be, then why was that small voice speaking to me on a regular basis? It kept reminding me that I could be a successful, vibrant, energetic and fully alive person right here and right now. In the words of Garth Brooks in his song, Standing Outside the Fire, “Life is not tried if it’s merely survived.”
Now I question my activities each day and ask, “Would a person who is thriving do this?” I’ve learned that people who thrive are focused and have a dream or a vision that motivates them. They are enthusiastic and look forward to learning and growing. Time is precious to them, and they want to spend it in pursuit of their passion.
I’m not there yet, but I am on my way. I’m creating a new life by focusing on what is important to me and what makes me happy. There are times when I try something new just to see if I enjoy it. I’ve let go of obligations that drain me. I find it easier to say, “No,” if the activity doesn’t align with my path. There is a sense of freedom in living life this way. Would you consider joining me on the quest to find perfect happiness?